Saturday, 25 June 2011

Una Paloma Blanca :)

There was applause. There was noise. There was music. There was the fragrance of excitement and anxiety in the air. And there she was, standing silently in the midst of the commotion around her. Now and then she would smile silently at a comment a fellow participant passed, or advise one of her team mates about one thing or the other. But apart from that there wasn't much she wanted to say or do.
Una Paloma Blancaaaa
I'm just a bird in the sky..
Una Paloma Blancaaa
Over the mountains I fly
No one can take my freedom away...
She was back in the 5th grade, wearing a sparkling white frock, with a band of paper flowers around her head. Like a little white duckling she had pranced on to the stage and in front of the not so silent audience. For how could the audience even be silent? It was full of parents awaiting their child's performance,when their tiny tot would showcase his or her talent in front of the packed auditorium and make them proud!
It had felt so effortless. The smile on her face refused to fade.It felt natural, the dance steps seemed to be engraved inside her head, her own and not part of a choreography. The stage was hers and she was the star, the beautiful little duckling who paved her way into the hearts of so many who couldn't stop "Aww"ing over her...

Una Paloma Blancaaaa
I'm just a bird in the sky..
Una Paloma Blancaaa
Over the mountains I fly

And then, she had never turned back. The applause became an addiction. But more than that, all she had wanted was growth. Improvement. And several other achievements. She had grown after each performance, absorbing something or the other from each practice session. Some days were wonderful, others not so fruitful. She was reprimanded, made to practice for hours at a stretch. She had fainted, wounded her elbows and knee caps. The scars still remain,reminding her of the  joy of learning each time she looks at them, and not of the pain and unpleasantness. Each time someone remarks upon  her scarred shins, she proudly announces "Oh these? My dance practices gave them to me!"
It had grown from a pass time, to a hobby, to her passion, and then, something beyond it. The backstage had become her trusted friend, the wings had comforted her each time anxiety had gotten the better of her.
 "The Jazz Group. You're up next" had become words she was so familiar with that she could whisper them under her breath, in perfect coordination with the teacher who made the announcement.
Years had passed. People now knew her as "the dancer". They knew her signature steps, her expressions seemed familiar. And as for her, everytime she walked on to The Stage, she knew she was back home. She now knew it as well as she knew the back of her hand. She felt a sense of belonging, as if it was HERS. The Stage had given her all that people hadn't. It had given her a reason to live, to laugh. It had given her the opportunity to be herself and no one else. It had given so much and never asked anything in return. And now was the time. To thank it, and to give back :)
For a person who saw her at that point of time, it would have seemed as if she was going over her dance routine  in her head. Alas, they had it all wrong! For as soon as the wings had welcomed her back into their warm,comforting arms, winning or losing had no longer mattered. She knew that as soon as she stepped on to the wooden stage that she loved so much, all her worries, anxieties, all her frustration and fears would vanish. All the anger, the hopelessness, the determination to win that she had felt during the practices would no longer hold any importance. It was her time to shine, to show them all that the little duckling had grown into a White Swan, who was ready to spread her wings and fly away. It was her time to pay  homage to the stage that had nurtured her and given her the confidence to stand with her head held up high. Moments before her very last performance, the song that played in her head wasn't the one she was supposed to dance to in a few minutes. It was the one that she had danced to in a sparkling white frock,years ago. Of her very first.

Una Paloma Blancaaaa
I'm just a bird in the sky..
Una Paloma Blancaaa
Over the mountains I fly..

18 comments:

  1. =)
    Beautiful, may she be known by many, and by all, in the way she longs to be known.

    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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    1. All one can do is hope :)
      Thanks :)

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  2. Wow. You're so lucky to have found that comfort, that belonging.
    Never let it go :)

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  3. Amazing. :D
    You are an amazing dancer. And, Your dances have always been great. Never let go of dance Ruhani. Its what you are, It seems to me.!

    This blog post just gave me a flashback too, A performer can relate to another you know. :)

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    1. It is, indeed :)
      Yes, I agree with you Joyee :)

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  4. This is awe-inspiring. YOU are awe-inspiring.
    I've seen you dance as that little girl with spectacles, to that sexy woman with the most energetic movements ever.
    And let me tell you, you rocked. Through it all.
    PS- I hope that you count writing as one of your talents. Whatte piece! =)

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    Replies
    1. Haha oh how I love you, Paaji! =D <3

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  5. What a lovely peace of poetry in prose. I can hear the song in my mind...

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  6. LOVED IT. :D

    http://musingsofjustanothergirl.blogspot.com/

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  7. "My strong point, if I have a strong point, is performance. I always do more than I say. I always produce more than I promise."

    I understand and relate the addiction and attraction the stage and the adulation holds for you. It IS intoxicating. :)

    This piece moved me to tears...It is beautiful and pure.

    Never quit Mishti...Never!
    Dance is you...you are the dance.
    :*

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    Replies
    1. I won't. Ever.
      Thank you Diwidaadi :)

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  8. It's probably me, because I always turn something beautiful into madness, but it reminded me a little of Black Swan. The resemblance is far-drawn but you know it's there. :P
    May the lady be known for her passion, for what she loves and gives her life to. May the wings take her away again every time.
    Beautiful anecdote. :)

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    Replies
    1. You're not the only one, trust me =P
      Thank you so much :)

      Delete
  9. So you like to dance, I see.
    There is nothing in this world as revered for me, as the passion for an art. Good luck Ruhani :)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, I do! :)
      Thank you so much :)

      Delete

Why you no comment? Waaaaaaaa :(