IMISSMYBLOGSOFREAKINGMUCH.
Yes, after MONTHS I am finally gonna post something, and this is all I have to say. Bummer.
OR maybe more. Lets' see where minding typelessly could possibly lead. So I visited my blog after like the longest time possible and found out that I had 44 followers. Wow. The last time I looked, they were probably 30 or something. It makes me wonder whether people actually found a sneak peak into my life interesting. It made me realize that well, atleast till like a few months back, I was a happy person who did what she liked, what she loved, and what her instincts asked her to do. But my life NOW is overshadowed by fear, regret and hopelessness. I haven't blogged in months, I don't remember the last time I actually danced my heart out,laughed my ass off, genuinely. I don't remember the last time my smile reached my eyes,the last time I told myself "Yes. I'm proud of myself. Because I'm crazy. I'm a child with unbounded energy. And hell, I'm free!". It feels as if everything, everyone is holding me back. I want to be ME. Please let me be?
With a lump in my throat, I'm finally going to admit. Yes I am a sciencee. And I no more have a life.
PS. On re-reading the entire thing, I realized that in the second line, "minding typelessly" should have actually been "typing mindlessly". But I let it be, nevertheless. So that months later, when I am reading this post, I am reminded of my state of mind on the 4th of January,2012 :)
Yes, after MONTHS I am finally gonna post something, and this is all I have to say. Bummer.
OR maybe more. Lets' see where minding typelessly could possibly lead. So I visited my blog after like the longest time possible and found out that I had 44 followers. Wow. The last time I looked, they were probably 30 or something. It makes me wonder whether people actually found a sneak peak into my life interesting. It made me realize that well, atleast till like a few months back, I was a happy person who did what she liked, what she loved, and what her instincts asked her to do. But my life NOW is overshadowed by fear, regret and hopelessness. I haven't blogged in months, I don't remember the last time I actually danced my heart out,laughed my ass off, genuinely. I don't remember the last time my smile reached my eyes,the last time I told myself "Yes. I'm proud of myself. Because I'm crazy. I'm a child with unbounded energy. And hell, I'm free!". It feels as if everything, everyone is holding me back. I want to be ME. Please let me be?
With a lump in my throat, I'm finally going to admit. Yes I am a sciencee. And I no more have a life.
PS. On re-reading the entire thing, I realized that in the second line, "minding typelessly" should have actually been "typing mindlessly". But I let it be, nevertheless. So that months later, when I am reading this post, I am reminded of my state of mind on the 4th of January,2012 :)
Science is good, if I got it right that you are now a science student (sciencee?).
ReplyDeleteAnd it wouldn't be wrong to say that everything is science, and you being an artist, it would come naturally to you. Just look out. :)
Cheers,
Blasphemous Aesthete
I though you laughed your heart out on the 31st. And your smiled reached your eyes. It didn't? :O
ReplyDelete@Blasphemous Aesthete. I have been one for sometime now. And how I wish it could actually be that easy. Bleh.
ReplyDelete@Vatsal. It did.. but um...it wasn't ENTIRELY genuine. Sorry :|
Ironic, because it says in your blog description, "Because though I am a sciencee,i still have a life :)"
ReplyDeletehaha Hey us 'sciencees' have it better than the rest. Trust me. The creator in you is your bent of mind. The 'sciencee' is just a name. But you know what Shakespeare said. Blasphemous and I were sciencees too, by the way. :P
All the best. :D
That is exactly how it was supposed to be. Ironic. =P
ReplyDeleteHaha I sort of figured it out from his comment =P
Thank you :)